I want to tell you about my bad days. Why? Because the bad days I have now, would have been considered good days a year ago! My bad days have improved to the point that, early last year I would have been happy to spend a day at that level, I would have considered it a pretty great day in fact! Read on
Author Archives: susiekenzie
Noticing The Little Things
I got caught in the rain on Sunday doing my daily walk and instead of cringing or shrieking or running to my car I just grinned, exulted to be out in the elements and feeling alive. I strode on down the path and put my face up to the falling water and felt happy and hopeful. Read on
Climbing back up the cliff
I recently found myself in a CFS setback, back to being housebound and some days bedbound. On the other side of this setback though, having returned to my baseline, I can now see that it was a good thing, that those six weeks of fatigue and confusion and pain and grossness were actually worth it. Why? Because I realised my health is actually improving! Read on
Fatigue-iversary
I had a nasty thought the other day that my entire year as a 27-year-old was just spent being sick. Wow, that’s a great way to make yourself miserable Susan, so let’s rearrange that thought little miss overachiever. Ok, yes I was sick with CFS for my 28th year on this earth, but more importantly some very good things happened too.
Read on
Grieving for the past two years
Why have I been so sad? Why do I cry watching clichéd American TV shows? Where has my motivation gone? What’s going on? Am I depressed again? Or maybe it’s something else… Something else? Maybe it’s July. And why is July significant? Well, it just so happens that in the month of July, two exhausting years ago, I got sick, and I didn’t get better. Read on
Hey There Kiddo, It’s OK
Recovering from CFS isn’t a matter of snapping your fingers and waking up all better; it’s a slow journey with many twists and turns. Given this, I need to cut myself some slack and realise that I’m looking after myself the best way I can. I almost need my own personal cheerleader telling me “awesome, right on, like totally freak me out!” Read on
Alarm Bells Ringing
Mayday Mayday Mayday! I am without power, crash approaching, arm your battle stations, this is not a drill. Oh dear, I’ve done too much, I knew I was pushing it but I was having so much fun so I decided to push through. Pushing through worked for me for 26 years, maybe it would again? Err, no. Read on
CFS Awareness Day
It’s CFS Awareness Day today people! I’m wearing blue (the CFS colour) and heading to the CFS Health Centre this evening to gather with other chronically fatigued warriors and find some solidarity. It won’t be a late night, we’re bringing blankets and pillows and it will be delightfully low-key. I’ll also be surrounded by people who 100 percent understand my illness. Yes! Read on
I can’t “do it mine own self” with CFS
This is me as a kid, an independent stubborn little tyke known to utter things like, “I do it mine own self” when confronted with something challenging and not wanting help from my parents. Not much has changed since then, I still want to do everything myself (group projects were an anathema to me!) Read on
Busy Being Not So Busy
Many people have told me that having chronic fatigue really teaches you a lot about yourself and how you view the world. For me, I think the biggest lesson I’ve learnt is stopping the glorification of busy in my life; getting off the treadmill and taking time to notice how I’m feeling. Read on
a snoozie life 